Don’t get too busy making a living that you forget to make a life

The rat race. I for one feel the pressures of the rat race even if they are not always real.

The implied pressure from your parents, your partner, your partners parents, your siblings, your partners siblings. The list goes on.

That old mantra of trying to keep up with the Joneses.

Everyone is looking to get that next promotion and move up the ladder in the hope that they will make some extra cash that will make them feel better one day.

But this all comes at the expense of the life you are living now.

When you have colleagues around you that want to climb the greasy pole and then you have that colleague that gets promoted to the next level above you, it makes you think “hey, I should get promoted too”.

It is healthy to be ambitious but it is really important not to forget the importance of the relationship you have with those closest to you.

I have seen some of my previous managers work themselves into the ground. Stressing to get deliverables out the door and working crazy hours to meet the unreasonable demands of clients.

I have seen this lead to those same managers losing their personality and social awareness. Putting pressure on those below them and giving no empathy to those with less experience who are struggling. Even after they had to complete those courses on “diversity and inclusion”. Albeit, one could argue that they didn’t have much time to read the text on the screen properly whilst (completing those courses) because their mind was too full of existential dread as a result of the impending call with one of their upset clients.

These same managers have then gone on to lose their wives and children along with the respect from some of their colleagues. This is sad because in the beginning the intention was to support their family and create a better life.

Work can ruin people and ruin families. Unfortunately, the corporate wheels keep turning. They might try to convince you that they are trying to improve wellbeing but really all that matters is results. If the bean counters think it makes sense to put pressure on one part of the business, they will have no remorse when pulling the trigger.

In the UK alcohol is also a major problem and there is an argument that the amount of alcohol consumed is likely directly linked to those trying to escape from their stressful day to day lives. Friday night comes and the bottle top gets popped off the beer or wine bottle. The stressed out prisoner of the workplace gets to put their feet up and try to forget all those items on their “to do” list that they haven’t managed to get to yet.

I for one have been as guilty as all of the above as anyone else and still am at times.

At the moment it feels like a necessary evil. A well-worn treacherous path that many have walked along before us.

All of the above is a major reason to cut short your professional working career within a profit driven corporation. A major reason to pursue a life which does not involve consuming just to provide yourself with short term endorphins to make yourself feel better for the daily stress you have to endure.

Now you may believe that you can cope with corporate life and that you enjoy the structure of having a career. This is completely acceptable. But working towards a path where you do not depend on a monthly salary to pay off unnecessary debts will greatly reduce the pressure you experience. I would argue however that the pressure of corporate life in this day and age greatly reduces the quality of life that professionals are able to lead outside of office hours.

I for one find it very difficult to switch off. Many thoughts dart through my mind. Constantly thinking about what needs to be done during the next working day or week. I had to delete my email account on my phone as I found myself refreshing the page even on weekends as if it was my Instagram feed.

OK, it isn’t always so intense but it quite often is. I for one would much rather reduce the stress I am under if I thought it was the most optimal route to take.

I think this is where the question of FIRE or not to FIRE comes in. When I say FIRE, I obviously mean Financial Independence Retire Early (for those not aware). For me, this is the only goal that makes climbing the greasy poll worth it. Cutting my professional working life short. Opening new opportunities. Providing me with the headspace to pursue new goals without the reliance and pressure of my day job to pay the bills.

What also does need to be realised though is that this period of time where you chase after the dream of FIRE, you need to take a step back now and then. It can’t just be a sprint to the finish line. If you climb the greasy poll, realise promotion after promotion and increase your salary very fast, you will likely soon get very burnt out. This burn out is likely to be compounded by the fact that you are saving aggressively for FIRE.

You need to be very careful that on your journey to FIRE, you do not forget about those closest to you. You might feel as if you are making significant progress with your net worth but your relationships and quality of life also needs to be taken care of. The last thing you want is to forget about those closest to you and lose it all. At the end of the day, you are pursuing FIRE so that you can spend more time with them and to create a life which improves your current situation significantly.

Take time off, spend more money than you should from time to time and enjoy your life now. As long as you don’t push the pendulum too far, you will still reach FIRE.

Prioritise making a life, not a living. Remember, time is the ultimate currency.